They’ve distracted. Attracted. Seduced. Been exposed to a dozen or more Spanish summers. They’ve nurtured, been a pillow to babies and children and some grown men too. They’ve waxed and waned, heaved and sagged.

More recently during their trial for treason they’ve been squashed in a mammography machine, subjected to MRI, biopsied using a device like a stapler and pierced with six needles containing radioactive dye. Found guilty, their sentence saw them covered with dotted lines from a permanent marker – like a butcher’s poster.

And then they were cut off.

Next they will be spread under a microscope and pathologised.

Once, they were lovely things. So lovely and the source of so much joy. But as my friend and colleague Jodie observed:

no amount of loveliness you get from your breasts compares with what you’re going to gain by losing them.

5 Comments on A eulogy

  1. Sammy Leader. They had a good innings, this is true. They have been with you through the golden days – your adolescence, courtship and baby-making to the power of 3. Isn’t that great. Let’s toast to their time. Whats important from now, is that YOU are here. Let’s toast to that too. Paige xxxx

    • Paige, Paige, Paige… a nice innings indeed and yes they were with me during a lot of good times. I hope to learn to first accept, then maybe even love my new boobs and hope I get to raise a glass to them with you before too long.

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